The Choice and The Chosen: A True Story
By Rashmi Rajan
It was first of a kind experience for her. She wasn’t sure what was happening. He was her best friend who had just come out of a terrible break-up with her help and support. While she was fetching him out of his misery, he was falling in love with her. Or was it really love? Driven by the feeling he had started to develop for her, he proposed her on that New Year’s Eve.
She had been in search of her prince charming, her knight in shining armour, for 23 years and hadn’t found him yet. So when Kritika saw Abhi falling in love with her, she gave her dream man the face of her friend.
They were head over heels in love with each other. Or was it love? Their day began with she calling him up with a love-filled good morning wish and their nights ended with he calling her up after he returned home from his night outs. It was time for weaving romantic dreams for her but at home it was time to kick start the search engine and find her a suitable guy before she turned a year older. With bio-data of supposedly suitable candidates flowing in, she started fearing the end of her relation with Abhi.
Abhi was in his final year of MBA. Kritika wanted to know what their future was. She wanted to know if their relation was heading somewhere, if his family was going to accept her. She needed just an assurance so that she could confidently disclose her love for Abhi before her family, who could not in their remotest dreams ever think of their daughter treading the forbidden path of love.
Abhi too saw a future with Kritika. He wanted to see her everyday and loved her dearly. Or was it love? One day during one of his late parties with friends he presented before them the idea of talking to his elder brother about his choice for life. They were taken aback.“Have you gone mad?” They asked. “You want to get married! Girls and love are bearable only till you get married. As soon as girlfriends turn into wives, their love becomes dominating and suffocating. They take away all your freedom and peace.”
Abhi couldn’t picture Kritika in any of the ways his friends described. She had always been very loving and caring towards him. Even when they fought, he knew it was because they cared for each other. They would patch up after each fight and there would be more love between them than ever before. Or was it love? Then why were these guys saying all this?
With constant persuasion and his friends backing their statements with examples from real life, he fell for their words and discarded the faith he had in his love. Or was it love?
That day when he called her up, she could sense some uneasiness in his voice. She couldn’t feel the love she felt everyday when he spoke. She asked him what the matter was. After much denial he said,
“My mother has fixed my marriage with one of my relatives’ daughter. I told her that I wanted to marry you but she said that if I don’t agree to marry this girl then our family relations will get soured. I don’t know what to do.”
Though his last statement expected an answer, it was more like a close-ended statement for Kritika. She couldn’t afford to add a word to it in reply. She knew somewhere that it was an excuse but ‘why’ is something that she couldn’t understand. At least their relation was not so shallow that he couldn’t have been honest to her. She had no choice. She had to play along her parent’s decision—and they had made their choice. The boy was an NRI settled in UK with a very good family background.
“Kritika, look at his photo and bio-data. If you see his photo once, you would not think of saying no,” said her extremely excited mother.
Kritika knew that though she didn’t love this guy, she had to move on.
“I don’t need to know how he looks. I just want to make sure that I can learn to love him. So please hand me over his bio-data and not his photograph,” said Kritika trying to sound as interested as possible.
She read his profile carefully and found nothing that could move her. On the contrary there was something about this guy she didn’t like but she wasn’t sure what it was.
“He seems very mechanical.” That’s all she could say.
Her mother got irritated on hearing this. At once she said, “This is all because of your too well-read mind and your literature books. Every boy cannot be your Shakespeare. Don’t try to read too much between the lines. If there is actually something wrong with this boy, then how come none of us sees it?”
“First of all Maa (mother) what’s wrong with being a little well-read? Secondly Shakespeare is not mine to keep or reject. And most importantly I am not sure why I don’t like this guy but I don’t get good vibes from his profile,” said Kritika trying to sound as casual as she could but feeling helpless inside on not being able to give a good reason.
Her father overheard the conversation and walked into the room.
“Don’t make a hasty decision dear. At least talk to him once. There will be absolutely no pressure on you.”
That night he called. Kritika’s sister, Divya, answered the phone and then called her with a naughty smile, teasing Kritika with her eyes. It was not a very comfortable situation for Kritika to talk to the guy with her parents and sister in the next room. She tried to forget about them and started talking to him. He seemed alright yet she was not comfortable. He seemed to be considerate yet what was it that made her not like him, she didn’t understand.
She shared her uneasiness with her sister who apparently knew about Abhi. She at once responded,
“It’s all because you are still hung up on that silly boy who didn’t even have the guts to stand by you when you needed him.”
“Please didi (elder sister), if he backed out he may have had his own reasons. So do not blame him. Moreover, I have made up my mind about getting married where mom dad say. So I am sure it’s not that. I feel it’s my sixth sense, my gut feeling, my instinct or whatever you may call it. I don’t get good vibes from him.”
“Don’t be silly Kritika. He is perfectly fine, well settled and you are just acting childish. It’s not your sixth sense. It’s what we call nonsense.”
She didn’t have a choice. She had to surrender. That night she soaked her pillow in tears. All through the night she kept asking god why He hated her so much. Why is it that every time she made a choice, He turned the events in a way that she was left with no choice? By the time it was morning her tears had run dry. She got up from the bed, looked out of the window, up at the sky and said,
“God! Will you ever let me make a choice and keep it? What have I done that you keep crashing my dreams?” She decided to take the option she had been given by her parents. She met Gaurav, her parent’s choice for her life, and after ten days she got engaged to him. The explanation given to her by her parents was that she still had 6 months to know him before marriage as the marriage according to rituals could only happen after 6 months. However, they had to register their marriage on the day of their engagement so that she could apply for a passport.
Gaurav went back to UK and she though lived in India, used to live the life of both countries. She would attend college all day, come back home, help her mom with the household chores, study, then sleep for 2 hours and then snuggle up before the computer to chat with Gaurav, who would according to UK time be back from work. Initially the talks were quite nice. He said he had started falling in love with her. Or was it love? But as familiarity crept into their relationship, she found him becoming more aggressive and violent in his responses. It used to startle her at first. But with each passing day it started freaking her out. She would find him bursting out on every little thing and she would end up in tears. Slowly, her nearing exam dates and her fiancé’s high disregard for her, started taking a toll on her health. The vivacious girl who had a unique glow of happiness on her face and an upbeat tone in her voice started to wither away. Her face now looked tired and her eyes had sunk deep into her face.
Unable to handle the pressure any longer she told her parents that she could not get along with Gaurav’s nature and wanted to end the marriage. Her parents were shocked. She had spoken the undesirable. By now everybody knew about her engagement. How could they break it? It would be such a disgrace to the family! They tried to pacify her by bringing in concepts of ‘long-distance relations and its effect’ and ‘pre-wedding jitters.’
She knew she was never afraid of commitments. In fact, it was her dream to have a family, a husband and a loving marriage. With persuasions pouring in from everywhere, she went along with the plan. The wedding took place. She feared each step she took around the sacred fire. Along with the wedding vows she promised herself to adjust with everything the marriage offered, even her husband’s temper tantrums. Even while smiling for the camera she kept telling herself,
“May be it’s just another test God is taking and I cannot give up that easily.”
After a month of marriage and her life in UK, an ISD call changed the winds in Kritika’s residence. Her father answered the call.
“Dad, can you come online?” came a sound from the other end. It was Kritika, but she sounded different.
He didn’t know what to say or think, so he quickly turned on the computer and anxiously waited as the internet lazily got connected. He found her online. A second later a message popped up. “Webcam request from Kritika—‘Accept’ or ‘Reject’?”
As he clicked “Accept” a blank window appeared on the screen. A moment later a woman’s face appeared in it. They knew her but they couldn’t quite recognize her. After a moment their eyes grew wide. Tears from both eyes started to trickle down their cheeks racing against each other to see who could flow faster.
It was their dear daughter Kritika.... But her face was distorted. It had black and blue patches and was swollen at many places. She looked like a disfigured lump of clay.
Words choked in their throat.
“W-Wh-W-What is this? H-How did this happen?” Kritika’s parents said in overlapping statements. Their heart beat was so loud that they feared that Kritika would hear them. “Daddy! Maa! Gaurav....He hit me. I am scared Daddy. I am really scared. He slapped me till I could feel his hands on my cheeks. After that I could only see him hit me as my cheeks had become numb with pain. Daddy, please help me. Please ask him not to hit me again. I will do whatever he says. But ask him not to hit me. Tell him I will be an Indian wife.”
“What!!!! Indian wife!” said Kritika’s father in a shocked and angry tone. Her mother immediately put her hand on his shoulder to calm him down. He tried to suppress his anger and said, “Please ask him to speak to us right now.”
Kritika raised her eyes and looked up at the prancing angry man walking up and down the room and said,
“Daddy wants to talk to you.”
He pushed her aside and sat before the computer, with anger still written all over his face.
“What?” he grunted
“What is this son? What Indian wife? Kritika has always been an Indian wife to you and you can’t deny that. She left her job because you didn’t like her going out. She cooks everything for you unlike the wives of your friends who keep ordering from restaurants every other day. She helps you with your MBA studies, never disrespects your parents, and never stops you from doing anything you like. So what did she do today that was so “un-Indian” that you had to hit her?”
Gaurav remained silent, grinding his teeth.
“What is it son? Do you have a reason for being so brutal towards my little child?” asked the concerned mother.
“Yes,” he roared. “I do have a reason. She was asleep when I came back from the market. I had to open the door on my own and yet she didn’t realise that I was home. She disrespected me by doing that. She should have been up on her feet when I came home.”
Kritika’s parents couldn’t believe what they were hearing. Their eyes pained as if some high voltage light had been flashed at their eyes. Unable to believe, her father asked to confirm,
“She disrespected you by falling asleep? Do you understand that she is a human being and your wife and not a superwoman or a guard?”
But Gaurav still didn’t understand their point.
“You people have spoilt her with all your love and care. I know how to make her brains work right. She should receive such a dose to keep her on track.”
“And what do you think I am going to stand here watch my daughter becoming a victim of your madness?” “Send her back right now or else there will be people at your door in half an hour to take her away and I will also make sure that you are behind the bars,” said Kritika’s father with anger burning like a forest fire in his eyes.
That did the trick. He was scared. Apparently his braveness was only limited to hitting his wife. Unwillingly he agreed and left the room. Kritika sat in front of the computer again. She was trembling with fear.
“Sweetheart, don’t worry. He won’t hurt you again. Just come back. I am booking your tickets for the earliest flight.”
“No Daddy! Book the tickets for a week from now. And just keep checking in on me till then,” said Kritika wiping her tears off.
Her father was surprised at his daughter’s request. “What!!! Why?” he asked.
“Because there are bruises on my face and his hand impression is clearly visible on my cheeks. If I go out of this house people will come to know that somebody has hit me. I don’t want him to end up in some major trouble.”
“Have you gone crazy? You are still thinking about his wellness!”
“Daddy, it’s my choice not to live with him anymore. I have no right to punish him for that. If he deserves a punishment, he will get it.”
“My girl! He has to be taught a lesson.”
“What is more important Dad? Getting back your daughter or taking revenge?”
“Getting you back, of course.”
“Then you are getting what you want. Please don’t ask for more.”
Kritika’s parents tried to talk to Gaurav’s parents, but they saw nothing wrong in their son’s actions.
A week later, hiding her fading scars under layers of makeup, Kritika landed in India. Her parents were happy to get their daughter back alive but couldn’t say a word out of the guilt of having ended their daughter up in such a terrible situation.
It was a difficult time for Kritika and her parents as more and more people came to know about her unfortunate marriage. A couple of days later Gaurav’s mother called Kritika up and said,
“Kritika, though none of us was there when u needed us, still you did no harm to us. I just wanted to thank you for not filing a case against my son. He could have lost his job. I am so thankful to you and I really respect you for this kind gesture. I wish my son had more sense.” After that day Kritika started spending all her time smiling and trying to make her family smile. Her mother kept wondering why she seemed so upbeat. She went to Kritika and asked,
“You don’t have to hide your tears from us. You can cry if you want.”
“No Maa! I don’t want to cry. I have cried for the past month thinking why God hated me so much that he won’t ever let me have what I choose. The more I thought about it the more it made me miserable. I may not have actually known till now what ‘being loved forever’ means but I know for sure that there’s one guy up there who loves me so much that he wants me to earn my choice just like I earned the respect of Gaurav’s mother. May be I am his chosen one. And the day I earn it, he will not take it away.”
Saying this much, Kritika looked out of the window, up at the sky and said,
"Bring it on big guy! I am ready for the next challenge. ”
